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So, over the past few months I've been rewatching my DVDs of this with a friend. Introducing him to the series, addicting him to it. Tonight we finished up with "Everyone's Waiting." Both he and I were so emotionally drained. It's so...The show shoves its hands in your guts and just wrings them out. Wrings everything you have out. I know of no other show that does that to such a wide audience. For me, personally, Dead Like Me really hits me emotionally but still not to the level of this.

Some observations with my third or forth complete viewing of the series. Alan Ball has made the argument that the series is really about Claire. The show closes with her clouded eyes, and a possible interpretation could be made that everything was a flashback from her deathbed. Others argue for Nate. His appearance on the show started it, and the five years after that decision to stay round out the show.

No one really makes the argument for David or for Ruth. I think I find it hard to say that NATE is the main character because of his development. We are left feeling really a lot of resentment toward him. After all, he says some of the most harsh things after he dies to Brenda. Absolutely repulsive things. But remember, these are Nate. These are Brenda manifesting her own conflict through this image. That said, when Nate tells Brenda that it's over between them on the hospital bed, I sincerely wonder how the producers intended for us to really leave that relationship. He says its over, dies, and Brenda is left with the anger. Then, in the final episode, she sees Nate bring her the baby, make the statement "I will always love HER (Willa" and then kiss Brenda. This is supposed to be our closure for their entire relationship. It doesn't work, and I think as an audience we're left feeling robbed of five years of investment. How Brenda feels.

Nate IS an asshole, and Brenda sums him up perfectly to Maggie in "All Alone" (I think, it may be Static) that Nate always wanted someone who made him feel like a better person than he really was. Nate's spiritual development is what we follow as viewers, but his fundamental flaws are what really gut-punch us as well. SO, where was I going with all this? Nowhere really, just describing some comments on my 4th watch through. But...if I had to make a stand on the Claire/Nate main character argument? I'd say that the show is about death. Everything ends. And while both Claire and Nate die, NATE is the one who dies during the immediate time line of the show. It's his arrival and death that open and close the show. He is the main character: despite the flaws, despite the anger, and despite the selfish acts of awful behavior.

More things I noticed: I LOVE Maggie's character. I know, if you love Brenda, you can't like Maggie. Wrong for me. Brenda is one of my favorite characters (Ruth being the other) and I still love Maggie. Maggie is the ultimate martyr. She gives up her own sense of self respect for Nate to feel better about himself. Her child died of leukemia, her husband left her, and all she has is her faith. And, she fucks someone's husband to death then brings them quiche. I LOVE Maggie. Her story compels me more than any of the "minor characters."

I noticed, because I had subtitles on, that on Brenda's death bed he's talking about Ted. How sad :-\. He never gets over Claire.

I really loved Margarat Chenowith more than I have in the past few viewings. She was the comic relief, I honestly think. I mean, when Ruth gives Maya her little monkey, Margarat interrupts and hands her that awful giraffe relative and then pushes the monkey on the floor! Not to mention, making the day Nate died about Olivier leaving her. And, crying loudest at his funeral.

I really like David's storyline as well. I mean, I don't want to paint over David, since his character was the reason I started watching the show. But his development is so transformative. Closeted gay man -- man whore -- in an abusive relationship -- scared of other people -- to owning his own self. It's really one of the best. I don't think we see anyone else really change as much as him. Claire grows quite a bit, especially with the Ted storyline, which I really love, but she still isn't...as different at the end as David is.

Finally, my lovely, Ruth. Ruth is the emotional center of the show for me. Her dialogs on motherhood "In my experience, motherhood is the loneliest job" are so well done. I think she's the best actor on the show, by far, and her age, her humor, her outbursts, her grief, and her sexuality are all spot on. My favorite "Ruth" storyline, and my favorite non-finale episode is "The Rainbow of her Reasons." I love her proactive decision to "leave" George, but still remain the best caregiver on the show, as well as her strong connection to other women. Although at the end of the episode, I"m reminded of the Heidi Chronicles "I thought the point was that we wouldn't feel stranded." God, I just love Ruth.

Sorry for the rambling, but no harm in bumping this AMAZING SHOW!