had to go to a safety/security meeting today. Much better than 2008's Sexual Harassment in the Workplace meeting where I was the ONLY ONE IN THE ROOM!
We got to hear about all the violence we dont know about that goes on in the company. Domestics, Worker v Worker and all the other nutjobs. Apparently if we were the TSA we'd be under an "orangish" alert every day.
then we got to watch a video. OH YES A VIDEO!!!!
"Shots Fired: When Lightening Strikes" (I was expecting Bruce Willis...I was disappointed)
::giddy::
first off, when you hear gun shots. They prolly are gunshots. Gunshots do not sound like they do on TV. If you think you hear gunshots react as though they are. Even if it ends up being a car backfiring...it's better to be safe than sorry (so I guess when I hear someone drop something I'm gonna run now... should make for some fun!)
You have three options. First is to GTHO! (get the hell out)
Run Forrest Run! Then call 911. Don't assume that everyone else is calling 911. They are probably soiling themselves in the bushes in the North parking lot. Oh and leave your belongings behind. Wait, how do you call 911 if you left your cell phone with the shooter? Do I yell really loudly?
Second option is to hide!
Do not hide all huddled together for support. (or sexing up) you are then an easy target. lock doors, turn off lights and barricade the door. be quiet but talk about a plan of attack in case Charles Manson finds you. Did I mention that the shooters will always look like Charles Manson? And in our movie, the shooter had a handgun AND an amazingly large AK 47. When the cops find you do NOT RUN UP AND HUG THEM!!!! They may shoot you. If you're under your desk, put your hands where they can see them and do not expect them to help you. They are there to kick some shooter booty.
Third option is to go all Chuck Norris on Charlie Manson!
If you are cowering in a room and he comes in, throw a potted plant at him and then all of you rush him and smack him and stuff. The fake plant will startle him into dropping the AK 47 and then you can all pull a United Flight 93 on him. Remember its YOU or HIM. Be prepared to be agressive! (B-E A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E) Even if you are hiding in a darkened conference room he may find you.
Oh yea and help those who are in total denial.
The End.
which is YOUR option???
We got to hear about all the violence we dont know about that goes on in the company. Domestics, Worker v Worker and all the other nutjobs. Apparently if we were the TSA we'd be under an "orangish" alert every day.
then we got to watch a video. OH YES A VIDEO!!!!
"Shots Fired: When Lightening Strikes" (I was expecting Bruce Willis...I was disappointed)
::giddy::
first off, when you hear gun shots. They prolly are gunshots. Gunshots do not sound like they do on TV. If you think you hear gunshots react as though they are. Even if it ends up being a car backfiring...it's better to be safe than sorry (so I guess when I hear someone drop something I'm gonna run now... should make for some fun!)
You have three options. First is to GTHO! (get the hell out)
Run Forrest Run! Then call 911. Don't assume that everyone else is calling 911. They are probably soiling themselves in the bushes in the North parking lot. Oh and leave your belongings behind. Wait, how do you call 911 if you left your cell phone with the shooter? Do I yell really loudly?
Second option is to hide!
Do not hide all huddled together for support. (or sexing up) you are then an easy target. lock doors, turn off lights and barricade the door. be quiet but talk about a plan of attack in case Charles Manson finds you. Did I mention that the shooters will always look like Charles Manson? And in our movie, the shooter had a handgun AND an amazingly large AK 47. When the cops find you do NOT RUN UP AND HUG THEM!!!! They may shoot you. If you're under your desk, put your hands where they can see them and do not expect them to help you. They are there to kick some shooter booty.
Third option is to go all Chuck Norris on Charlie Manson!
If you are cowering in a room and he comes in, throw a potted plant at him and then all of you rush him and smack him and stuff. The fake plant will startle him into dropping the AK 47 and then you can all pull a United Flight 93 on him. Remember its YOU or HIM. Be prepared to be agressive! (B-E A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E) Even if you are hiding in a darkened conference room he may find you.
Oh yea and help those who are in total denial.
The End.
which is YOUR option???
