I couldn't get more than a few paragraphs into it. Is it gay fiction? Seemed to be heading there.
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David Archuleta Hate - My Eardrums Have Been Crushed
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 dagny1331 |
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Posts: 1400 (05/17/08 1:13 PM) Registered User |
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MikiBoi |
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Posts: 2363 (05/17/08 1:18 PM) Registered user |
Last Edited By: MikiBoi
05/17/08 1:46 PM.
Edited 1 times.
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HoboKitty |
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Posts: 826 (05/17/08 1:19 PM) |
dagny1331 wrote: Well I think the shocking aspect is that one of them is an under-aged mentally challenged boy. MikiBoi - indeed, poor kid. FREE GASPY!
Last Edited By: HoboKitty
05/17/08 1:22 PM.
Edited 1 times.
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Fafulous |
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Posts: 361 (05/17/08 1:23 PM) I don't get |
I clicked the link and saw that the title was david/david fic.
I closed the tab before I became blind. Popchuleta really is a raging asshole, isn't he? |
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fffingybyach |
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Posts: 109 (05/17/08 1:29 PM) |
david/david fan fic? blech... course I used to love reading slashy fanfic on my fictional BTVS but 10 year old DA with DC? EWWWWW. I just can't look,
cause I don't want the visuals going into work.
yeah the tmz article confirms what a dick Jeff A is but it also pisses me off with the sympathy for Archie (no matter that it is probably deserved) because it just basically supports what we've read before (true or not but still more smoke/fire) that Jeff has tried to intimidate (for 3 months) other contestants ie - castro, cook.... where's the sympathy for the intimidated ai contestants? fucking asshat producers/bosses at AI |
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SurvivorFanGP |
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Posts: 7880 (05/17/08 1:35 PM) Registered user |
.....
That is the worst block of text i've ever read. I think I feel my lunch coming up as I read that.
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Lobsters |
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Posts: 6259 (05/17/08 1:42 PM) Registered User |
Papa Porkchop better watch his ass. He'll have a gang of pissed off Hausfraus after him if he messes with Cookie.
No sympathy from me for Porkchop. If he can't take it he should never have tried out (and it's obvious from the weepy hometown video that he can't take the heat.) |
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roadblocker |
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Posts: 14787 (05/17/08 1:44 PM) Registered User |
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Fafulous |
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Posts: 362 (05/17/08 1:45 PM) I don't get |
roadblocker wrote: |
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MikiBoi |
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Posts: 2364 (05/17/08 1:47 PM) Registered user |
I made up the article but I thought more of the Archie haters would explode with funny angry posts but it didn't happen. Oh well.
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roadblocker |
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Posts: 14788 (05/17/08 1:50 PM) Registered User |
You = David Cook
"Hey Archie," you say one morning, popping your head into his room. He's sitting on his bed with his nose buried in a book - you think maybe it's a Bible, so maybe you should leave - but he looks up and smiles. "Morning," he replies brightly, and stows the book away. You wonder, vaguely, how he can look so happy at eight AM. This kid is perpetually joyful. It's like a disease. You're pretty happy too, though, because you've got one of your famous jokes that you can't wait to share. And okay, you passed three girls this morning without pause. They would have been easy targets, but you didn't. You've been saving this one. You enter the room and lean against the open door. "Do you like water?" you ask seriously, and he tilts his head in confusion. A long three seconds pass before he decides it's safe enough to answer. "Um, yes. I do." He's blinking up at you innocently and you almost forget the punch line. Almost. "Then you like 70% of my body!" you laugh, and he stares at you for another moment before joining in. He's got a look on his face like he wants to add, "I like more than 70%," but he's David Archuleta and so he doesn't. You wink at him and he stops laughing and you clear your throat.
"Um, David, are you okay?" he asks you suddenly, sounding nervous. You're well aware that you're starting to sweat. You have to get this out in the open. "Archie," you say, and turn towards him. He turns the TV off so he can give you his full attention. You draw in a breath. "What do you think of me as? Like, an older brother? A friend?" David looks startled. "I… I don't know," he says uncomfortably. You merely wait, your expression telling him to be honest. He gets the hint. "Not a brother. Definitely not a brother. I guess a friend, but… more, too?" He immediately diverts his eyes, like he's said too much. "What do you mean?" you coax, and you shouldn't be doing this but it's too late now. "I don't know," he says so quietly you have to strain your ears to listen. "I mean, I don't have a girlfriend… I've never had one… I've never wanted one." x 100000
David wakes you up by jumping on your bed. It's the most un-Archuleta thing you've ever seen him do, but there he is, pouncing on you at seven o'clock in the morning. "Archie," you complain, but you can't help but laugh too. "It's so early." He stops jumping and climbs over you. His hands and legs are on either side of your body. Essentially, he's straddling you. You're thankful there's a blanket in between. "You never know how many mornings you have left," he says, and his face is merely inches from yours. He smiles. "Why waste this one?"
.. and it gets more disturbing from there |
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seaguy |
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Posts: 11146 (05/17/08 1:51 PM) AI Forum Moderator |
I couldn't read more than a couple sentences. That's fucking disgusting.
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Lobsters |
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Posts: 6260 (05/17/08 1:54 PM) Registered User |
I'm throughly skeeved out now. Disgusting!
(not that there is anything wrong with the gays...but seriously, seriously that was disturbing on SO many levels) |
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HoboKitty |
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Posts: 830 (05/17/08 1:55 PM) |
MikiBoi wrote: YOU WHAT? How dare you play around with our emotions like that. That article warmed my heart (not the pity, but the fact that Jeff was one step closer in
ruining his son's chances of winning). And now my heart had returned to its frozen state. You nearly made me gasp with this revelation. But I don't
gasp anymore. Not since it's become the trademark of Son of Jeff.
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MikiBoi |
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Posts: 2365 (05/17/08 2:00 PM) Registered user |
Sorry Hobo, I was bored.
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MikiBoi |
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Posts: 2366 (05/17/08 2:15 PM) Registered user |
roadblocker wrote:
But then he looks at you and you think maybe he does know. And maybe he's been having them too. Except his aren't creepy. You're the guilty party here. You're the one that Chris Hansen is going to come after -
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pemmiekim |
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Posts: 48 (05/17/08 2:19 PM) |
You catch a whiff of his cologne - isn't he too young for cologne? - and then meet his eyes and you abruptly feel caught off guard, completely and utterly confused. "Um," you begin, and he looks concerned because it's very rare that you don't know what to say. "I'm really tired. I should go to bed." "Okay," David says at once, no questions asked, because he's that kind of guy. "If it's weird sleeping alone, you can come into my room," he offers, trying to be helpful. "No." You answer so quickly that he looks hurt, and you feel your expression soften. "I mean, no thanks. I'm good. See you tomorrow."  As disturbing as it is, it's
actually quite genius.
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pemmiekim |
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Posts: 49 (05/17/08 2:21 PM) |
He puts his arms around you, for the very first time ever, and gives you the most comforting hug you've received in days. You wrap your arms around his -
surprisingly firm, not that you'd tell him that - waist and sigh. "Thanks, Archie."
"Of course," he says, and he gives you a squeeze before pulling away. You catch a whiff of his cologne - isn't he too young for cologne? - and then meet his eyes and you abruptly feel caught off guard, completely and utterly confused. "Um," you begin, and he looks concerned because it's very rare that you don't know what to say. "I'm really tired. I should go to bed." "Okay," David says at once, no questions asked, because he's that kind of guy. "If it's weird sleeping alone, you can come into my room," he offers, trying to be helpful. "No." You answer so quickly that he looks hurt, and you feel your expression soften. "I mean, no thanks. I'm good. See you tomorrow." As disturbing as it is, it's also quite genius.
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Fafulous |
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Posts: 363 (05/17/08 2:58 PM) I don't get |
I tried to read it for laffos, but when I got to the part where he ruffled Archie's hair playfully, the gag reflex became too strong. I can't believe
you all got through that literary vomit. I applaud you.
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The Infamous bLuEeYeDsOuL |
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Posts: 4455 (05/17/08 3:07 PM) Registered User |
Some of this shit reads like something you can probably find on a NAMBLA message board.
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- Survivor Sucks
- Lions, Tigers, Survivors - Oh My!
- Survivor Spoilers
- MESS Hall Tribal Council
- MESS Hall Archive
- Survivor Speculation
- Survivor 20+
- The Amazing Race
- Big Brother
- Big Brother - PAST SEASONS
- The Apprentice
- American Idol
- American Idol PAST SEASONS
- The Mole
- Lost
- Other Shows That Suck
- Off Topic
- Clubs That Suck. No, Really.
- The Dump
- Monster Island
- Purgatory
- FAQ
- In Memory, 9/11/01
