Why the hell is Julianne Hough trying to be the next Carrie Underwood? First Kellie Pickler, then Taylor Swift, then millions of other pretty blonde white girls into country music, now Julianne Hough. Stick to the dance floor, sweetie. Back to the show now: I won't be surprised if Warren Sapp wins, mainly because athletes have won the past four cycles. But I think it will come down to Lance Bass and Brooke Burke. Where consistency is concerned, Brooke has the win, even with that annoying Derek Hough. Where showmanship and pluckiness is concerned, Lance has the win, even with that annoying Lacey Schwimmer. Lance also has the momentum from last week, where he lead handily. As a gay guy, I'm pulling for Lance (yes, I'm one of the few gay men on Earth who actually likes Lance), but I also think that Brooke will probably win. Having said that, it would be interesting to see Lacey flop a second time in the Grand Final of a reality show. Which reminds me, what are the chances of Sabra Johnson joining DWTS?

Better her than Benji Schwimmer, I say. Are they really considering him for next cycle? While he's talented, let's face it: he's a Schwimmer.