Yuku free message boards

5th grade - I was quite the avid wrestling fan. Consequently, I drew up "WrestleMania" matches between the other boys in my class. This week was big. We were doing a 14 man (boy) elimination tournmanent to crown the undisputed champion. I was the smallest kid in my class. I opted to wrestle the LARGEST kid in the class. He was about 220lbs at the time. Not tall...just fat. We'll call him "Cartman".

I hit the playground like a man (boy) on fire. Everyone knew it was time to brawl. I found my opponent. I went up to Cartman and started running my mouth like most little kids and professional wrestlers do. He turned around like he really didn't want to wrestle. What a pussy, right? I jumped on his back and wrapped my arms around his neck in a sleeper hold type fashion. He swung me over his shoulder and I swear to you, I landed in the ONLY part of the playground that was covered in ROCKS instead of grass. Upon hitting the ground, I knew I was hurt. I went to get up, but as I looked up, I saw 220lb 5th grader Cartmen coming down on me with a King Kong Bundy SPASH! **CRRRRRRRUNCH**

He fractured my little 5th grade elbow. I cried like a girl. I was in a fucking CAST from my shoulder to my hand for 2 months. I was out of school for 3 weeks. While I was gone, my teacher cleaned out my desk and saw all of the wrestling matches I had written up pitting 5th grader vs 5th grader. Consequently, upon my return to school, I received a full week in DETENTION.

Unlike most of you, I learned what PWNED meant in 5th grade.