Yuku free message boards

Much has been said about Joshuah. He's abrasive. Misogynist. He's even a bully. It's a strategy used successfully by many straight male house guests. In fact the past 2 seasons, two of the meanest players in Big Brother history have won; Mike Malin, won All-Stars and Dick Donato, who actually referred to a fellow female house guest by the "c word" won season 8. Straight males get to be mean. They get to be bullies and no one says a word and if they do it's "them" behaving badly. The individual. But if the gay guy behaves badly, he's making "us" look bad. We as the LGBT community must stop thinking of ourselves as monolithic. What one gay man does should not define or demean our entire community. I did Big Brother. My actions speak only of me. I'm not here to represent any community. And neither is Joshuah.

A lot has been written about the gays on Big Brother and on reality TV in general. Many feel that only feminine men are cast, that are overly-dramatic. I find that particularly insulting since it's been lobbed at me many times. Can there ever be one gay man that everyone embraces? No, because no one can encompass all the mythical qualities that make a perfect human being. Being human is about being flawed. About making mistakes and falling. It's about learning from our mistakes and getting up, dusting ourselves off and trying to be better. It's about growth.

Reality TV at it's best is a great mirror into worlds we may otherwise not see. It can show us that we are all human no matter what our differences. Who doesn't remember Pedro Zamora from The Real World and his poignant struggle with HIV? He put a face on a disease many knew little about. Pedro's triumph of spirit was his own. It was beautiful to watch and made amazing TV. At the end of the day that's all we the viewer did, watch and as a performer that's all he did, perform. The same can be said of anyone who does any reality show. One woman is not a representative of all women. Neither is any man, regardless of his race or sexuality.

I look forward to meeting Joshuah. I want to welcome him to the Big Brother family. 56 days in the Big Brother house, away from family, friends and real life, is no small feat. I want to congratulate him on a job well done. And, besides, he's hot.