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Well, you can't have everything you want so here is what I suggest, since no one seems interested in answering your original question.

Keep a fairly large and deep plastic bowl in the sink to hold the soap water (I usually let my silverware soak in it 'til it's time to wash them), and run water into your dishes as you stack them so that they too soak. Rinsing off and pre-soaking dishes is the main key to simplify dishwashing. With the bowl of soapwater, you don't have to run a sinkful of water, and you can rinse the dishes as you wash them. You will have to get one of those dish rack strainers you hate, but the trick is to buy this thing that you put under the strainer that has a tilt to it, so that the water from the dishes in the strainer runs back into the sink. This way you don't have to dry the dishes, just let them drain off and air dry. It's also a plus if you have one of those spray attachments on your sink, as they make it easier to rinse things, though it is certainly not necessary.

One more tip: I use one of those wands with the sponge on the end to wash glasses, cups and silverware. It really saves the hands from excess exposure to soapwater, which dries my hands out terribly.

Hope this helps.